I’ve noticed a theme lately. Most of my female friends are in their 30’s, like me. I’ve noticed that, more and more, when they date someone for a while (good, bad, or other), and then it ends, the thing they are often the most upset about is not the guy himself, but the thought of getting back out into the New York dating pool, which often seems like a hopeless, annoying pool of dread. I understand this completely. By the time you hit your 30’s, you know yourself pretty well, and this often means that you’re more set in your ways. Dating, in the beginning phases, particularly if you’re not meeting anyone you really like, can seem more like a chore than anything else. At least, after Saturday, I learned that being in the New York dating pool might be a bit better than the Minneapolis dating pool, where there isn’t much real dating, but rather more "happy hours" and such where people just mingle. If you’re lucky, you find someone you like there (thanks to Katie’s sister Jenny, our Minneapolis correspondent).
What are your thoughts? Do you find the breakup worse than getting back into dating or vice versa?
Comments
10 responses
i think happy hours are great . . . if there are free hors d’oeuvres.
i think happy hours are great . . . if there are free hors d’oeuvres.
Depends…on how long the relationship lasted.
I don’t regret getting to know someone for a month or two and then it doesn’t work out, because I don’t put my life (work, friends, myself) on hold while I am dating someone. But if a relationship gets more serious and you were in it for a while and it doesn’t work out, then it kinda sucks. However dread is such and defeatist word. I am little more optimistic than that. The pool may be shallow but not dreadful. Wade a little, the water’s warm!
Depends…on how long the relationship lasted.
I don’t regret getting to know someone for a month or two and then it doesn’t work out, because I don’t put my life (work, friends, myself) on hold while I am dating someone. But if a relationship gets more serious and you were in it for a while and it doesn’t work out, then it kinda sucks. However dread is such and defeatist word. I am little more optimistic than that. The pool may be shallow but not dreadful. Wade a little, the water’s warm!
I think getting back in the dating world is tough no matter what city you’re in. I do have to agree with the comment Laren said about dating being a chore. It’s hard to get out there again. Truthfully, it’s hard to WANT to get out there again! Before I go looking for Mr. Right, I need to consult my friends Ben & Jerry….
I think getting back in the dating world is tough no matter what city you’re in. I do have to agree with the comment Laren said about dating being a chore. It’s hard to get out there again. Truthfully, it’s hard to WANT to get out there again! Before I go looking for Mr. Right, I need to consult my friends Ben & Jerry….
You know who never has trouble moving in and out of dating in my experience? People who don’t sit around contemplating dating, it is one of life’s ironies.
You know who never has trouble moving in and out of dating in my experience? People who don’t sit around contemplating dating, it is one of life’s ironies.
my 30-something female friends who find themselves single again more often get angry at the “lost time” with the recent ex with respect to their biological clock.
This whole subject gets people very, very upset
my 30-something female friends who find themselves single again more often get angry at the “lost time” with the recent ex with respect to their biological clock.
This whole subject gets people very, very upset