This article in Sunday's Modern Love column truly spoke to me.* After having long term relationships in my 20's, since then I haven't had any relationship that lasted longer than 8 or 9 months. I have many friends in the same situation. We feel defensive about it sometimes, like the woman in the article. We question: what is wrong with us? what could we do differently? do we repeatedly gravitate towards the wrong men? We try on different strategies: extreme dating, dating hiatus (or guy-atus), introspection. As time goes on, we grow more comfortable with our flaws, as they make us who we are. And, like the author of the article, we know in our hearts that the answer is simple:
"We just found the right guys. We found men who love us even though we’re still cranky and neurotic, haven’t got our careers together, and sometimes talk too loudly, drink too much and swear at the television news. We have gray hairs and unfashionable clothes and bad attitudes. They love us, anyway.
What’s wrong with me? Plenty. But that was never the point."
*That said, as @daisy17 astutely observed, the author can only write such an article now that she has gotten married. Had she not, she never would have done so.