Over the past few days, I've had more than one conversation with people I know about what they imagine their future life to look like, either with or without a significant other. I think about this quite a bit — I see a bright, open apartment with a yard or roof deck, space to entertain comfortably, a kitchen that allows me to cook with others. I imagine a very social lifestyle, somewhat like what I have now — having people over, going to outdoor concerts, visiting museums, going to restaurants — even when there are kids (hopefully) involved. I don't see myself living in the suburbs or keeping to myself. Maybe this is unrealistic with a family, but I don't think so, and it is what I strive to create in my life.
It becomes problematic when there are two people in the mix — if they don't share the same view of their ideal lifestyle, there will always be friction. It's certainly easier on one's own. But, what I'm realizing is that, family or not, I have the power and the ability to make my life what I want it to be — so stay tuned, folks, there may be some changes in the works. They won't take place right away, but slowly and steadily, I will add on the the life that I have to create the life I want to have in the future.
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8 responses
Okay, now I feel like a loser in that I haven’t really thought about it.
I mean, I think about it, but I don’t necessarily think of myself here in LA. But, then again, why not? I am social, and it works for me. I have no idea.
But, you may have me thinking. I do know that socializing will happen, and so will exercise. So we have that in common. 😀
Okay, now I feel like a loser in that I haven’t really thought about it.
I mean, I think about it, but I don’t necessarily think of myself here in LA. But, then again, why not? I am social, and it works for me. I have no idea.
But, you may have me thinking. I do know that socializing will happen, and so will exercise. So we have that in common. 😀
Sounds like an extremely healthy attitude. Could use some of that insight myself, but generally don’t want to face it. Soon. . .
Sounds like an extremely healthy attitude. Could use some of that insight myself, but generally don’t want to face it. Soon. . .
Disagree, my friend. There is not always friction where two people have different visions of daily life. At the end of the day, you can each get what you need. The problem arises when couples think that they must be together on all things. If you let go of that — the world is a beautiful and rich place. He can visit a museum with friends, while she sleeps. She can stay out late with friends, while he reads a book at home. What matters is not being together but coming back together and making the sum of a two-person relationship three, not one.
Disagree, my friend. There is not always friction where two people have different visions of daily life. At the end of the day, you can each get what you need. The problem arises when couples think that they must be together on all things. If you let go of that — the world is a beautiful and rich place. He can visit a museum with friends, while she sleeps. She can stay out late with friends, while he reads a book at home. What matters is not being together but coming back together and making the sum of a two-person relationship three, not one.
Jill — what you describe isn’t necessarily a problem. I was thinking more of a situation where he wants to have a house in the suburbs and she wants to live in the city. He’s happy just hanging out with his wife, kids, and extended family, and she likes to have friends over all the time or go out with other people rather then just as a couple all the time.
Jill — what you describe isn’t necessarily a problem. I was thinking more of a situation where he wants to have a house in the suburbs and she wants to live in the city. He’s happy just hanging out with his wife, kids, and extended family, and she likes to have friends over all the time or go out with other people rather then just as a couple all the time.