Sweet Blog O'Mine

Category: Life

  • Karma Police*

    First — thank you all for your get-well wishes. I have pretty much just been fighting off a nasty cold, although I think I finally lost the fight today. No puking, for those who asked, but I’m the biggest sick-whiner ever. I hate being sick. I’m convinced that your e-cards (thanks Erika), hugs, and soup helped fight it off an extra day, even though they were sent via the internet. Much lower risk of you guys catching anything that way, too. I still managed to make it through a day of work yesterday, and half the day today — had so much to do that there was no way I could stay home.

    Other than the plague that I’ve caught, I’m convinced that I’m riding on a wave of extremely good karma lately. I’ve been putting out the love and it has all come back to me big time. For example, I wrote about the amazingly delicious chili at the Daisy May’s BBQ carts last week, and Adam Perry Lang, who owns Daisy May’s BBQ, saw my post and offered to treat me to dinner as a thank you for spreading the good word about his place. I stopped by on my way home last night and chatted with Adam for a bit. He is the nicest, most generous guy — a pleasure to talk to, and not only did he send me off with a gargantuan take out bag, but he gave me a few samples of Jacques Torres chocolate which he’ll be using to make the Mexican hot chocolate that will be part of his chili cart menu as of next week. Even through the sniffles and the tissues, I managed to stuff myself silly with a sampling of Daisy May’s finest when I got home. Folks — run, do not walk, to 11th Ave and 46th St. and check this place out. If you can’t make it that far, visit one of the chili carts — the Mexican hot chocolate arrives Monday. And say hi to Jeff if you visit the cart on 50th & 6th — I got to meet him last night as well.

    Keep on spreading the good karma around. You never know when it might come right back at you!

    * Yes, a nod to the Radiohead song. Yes, I’m a hipster.

  • Sick as a Dog

    I am doing my best to fight off a cold and am therefore feeling neither creative nor witty. Wish me luck and feel free to send chicken soup.

  • Be Mine

    Being that it is the dead of winter and I’ve been feeling incredibly sluggish, I have been trying all sorts of creative approaches to get my sloth-like self to the gym. The most successful so far has been making gym “dates” — plans to meet friends at the gym for a spin class or for an early morning workout. Along these lines, I decided to buy myself a treat the other day. I bought a 5 pack of sessions with a personal trainer (having since told my mom about the idea, she bought them for me — thanks, mom!). After doing this, I realized that it was kind of a Valentine’s Day gift to myself. Apparently the marketing team at NYSC has been thinking the same thing:


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    As I approach my fourth (or is it fifth?) Valentine’s day in a row without an “official” Valentine, I have come to rely on my friends, family, and, of course, myself for a little V-Day love. And I have a great time giving love in return. I have sent my siblings heart-shaped brownies, sent valentines to friends, and have gotten candy-filled care packages, e-flowers, and all kinds of little valentine treats. Even just a “Happy Valentine’s Day” greeting can go a long way when you’re not in a relationship on V-Day. So — as you’re making your plans, be sure to spread the love around — and don’t forget to send a little my way, while you’re at it!

  • Once Again, Ahead of the Curve

    Time Out New York reports that online dating is dead.
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    As I mentioned recently, I have essentially given up on online dating. Well actually, to come completely clean, since that post, I had a one month stint on JDate, which essentially confirmed my conclusion that it is nearly impossible to find that “spark” via online dating sites. I cancelled it a few weeks ago. Once again, the offline method seems to be working quite well for me at the moment. [via New Yorkish]

  • The Ex Files. UPDATE.

    Congratulations, Nathan! As you may have read in an earlier post, my ex-boyfriend was a finalist in the Lego Master Builder competition. To those of us who know him, it comes as no surprise that Nathan has been selected to be a master builder at Legoland. I had no doubts that he would win. Read all about it.

  • He Pays, She Pays

    Almost everyone I know has (or at least had, when he or she was single and dating) a very complex set of rules and regulations when it comes to how money is handled on a date. Rules about who pays and why; if money should be offered and what that means; if that money is accepted, what that means; at what point along the dating continuum money no longer becomes an issue, etc. The unfortunate thing I’ve noticed, based on entirely non-scientific methods, is that each individual has his or her own set of rules and regulations. This creates a great deal of confusion. A seemingly basic first date scenario may go something like this:

    Boy asks girl out for drinks.
    Check arrives.
    Boy and girl reach for wallet.
    He says, “no — I’ve got it.”
    She says, “are you sure?”
    He says, “yes.”
    She says, “thanks.”

    Seems okay, right? Wrong. So many variables can come into play that apparently mean different things to different people. Some guys have told me that they are upset when women offer to chip in because it means they’re not really interested in a romantic relationship. This is crap. Many of us are offering to pay because we don’t want to feel obligated or to “owe” you anything. It’s the first date, for chrissakes. Some of us are offering to pay because we’re polite — that’s the way we were raised. Some guys get annoyed when women don’t offer to pay. “They should at least offer,” I’m told. Hear that, ladies? Once we’ve offered up some cash, are guys allowed to take it? “Sure,” I say, but this is not a universally held belief among my female counterparts. Some women are offended when a guy takes the money. “He’s not supposed to take it!” Confused yet? I know I am.

    According to my rules, if I ask a guy out, I will always offer to pay for both of us (I ask, I pay — my variation of don’t ask, don’t tell). If he asks me out, I will always offer to contribute to the bill, and will not be hurt/upset/offended if he takes the money. I will generally only insist a few times on my offer, but this depends on whether or not I like the guy. If he refuses my money, and I’d like to see him again, this is a perfect segue, “well, I’ll treat the next time.” If he refuses my money, and I have pushed a few times, and I don’t want to see him again, then screw it — I offered, not my problem anymore. I work for a nonprofit — I’m not rich — I’m only going to insist so many times.

    At some point in a relationship, who actually pays tends not to matter so much — it all kind of evens out in the end. I’ve forgotten what that’s like. Hmmm.

    So, dear readers, what are your rules?

  • The Ex-Files*

    A certain ex of mine has been getting tons of press lately. He is one of a small group of national finalists in a competition to become one of Lego’s master builders — basically, someone who gets paid to build things with Lego all day. This has been one of his lifelong dreams — when we lived together, we had Lego all over our apartment, which I very often had to explain to visitors. But his persistence and enthusiasm has paid off. Please join me in wishing him best of luck as he heads to San Diego next week to compete against the other finalists. If you’re interested, you can view some of his Lego creations in his gallery.

    It’s always hard to read about one’s exes, especially since the nationally syndicated article prominently mentions his current girlfriend. But I’m used to this — I had the lovely experience of reading about another ex’s wedding in the New York Times. I knew he was getting married, so this was no surprise to me, but I had to read, in excruciating detail, how he was “eager to propose” and exactly how he proposed to her. Made me want to barf. Sometimes I think it would be easiest if, once you stopped dating someone, he would just sort of vaporize, so you’d never have to hear about their current romantic relationships. But someday, I figure, they’ll have to read all about me and my boyfriend/husband. Granted, they will have to use bifocals or read it in the large print edition of the Times at the rate I’m going . . .oy.

    * Not to be confused with the X-Files.

  • Dork Protocol

    I have a friend who only recently got email. He doesn’t own a computer, but checks his email at his gym, where they have terminals for free internet access. He sent me an email last night that was ALL IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I called him to tell him that, according to email protocol, this was taken to mean that he was YELLING. His response? “That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. You really are a big geek.”

    Yes, I guess I am. And I fully embrace my geekiness.

    Speaking of geeks, there’s a certain geek out there in Seattle who was very upset that he was not yet mentioned in my blog. So — here’s a BIG SHOUT OUT to you, Geek!

  • I’m Down with O.P.B.*

    * Other People’s Blogs

    There’s something inherently voyeuristic about weblogs. They offer the general public a chance to peer inside other peoples’ thoughts, feelings and lives. For example, a co-worker was telling me that she started reading Megnut, because the author was a classmate of hers from Tufts (go Jumbos!). Around the same time, she started reading kottke.org. Somehow, through reading the two blogs, she and other readers realized that these two bloggers were dating. At the time, they were in two different cities, met at a conference, and began to visit each other. Reading their blogs carefully, readers could see things like — “when I was in San Francisco . . .” and ultimately followed the progress of their relationship.

    I have met one person through my blog, but have tentative plans to meet even more. After stumbling across Gaping Void and posting one of his cartoons on my site, Hugh MacLeod sent me a lovely email, wishing me a happy belated birthday and thanking me for plugging his cartoons (if you haven’t seen them yet — they’re great! Go check them out!). We have emailed a little and I offered to take him for a drink if/when he ever comes back to NYC. After reading his blog a little more closely, I noticed a rather provacative post (which of course caught my eye), and followed the links to another blog. Turns out that Hugh and Franny have a little blog-comment-flirtation going. Suddenly I felt like I had just hit on someone else’s boyfriend, which is a little strange, because I haven’t even met any of these people in person yet! Sorry, Franny — it was all very innocent, I swear! At least so far, I suppose — keeping my options open these days. Sadly, so far, no blog-comment-flirting for me yet (no wonder, considering that according to the roll-call, I only have three readers — all female. C’mon people — who are you?! I know you’re there — I can hear you breathing!). Ho hum. Guess I’ll have to stick with the in-person version!


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    courtesy of Gaping Void (thought this one was appropriate!)

  • We’ll Be Right Back After These Messages

    Happy New Year, everyone! I ended 2003 and started 2004 with a bang, and got all dolled up for the big night in a 50’s retro pink satin dress with black polka dots and a crinoline. Why the hell not, right? I think it’s the first pink item of clothing I have owned since I was about three. Did a bunch of party-hopping, drank way too much champagne, and still feel rather hung over. I will admit, however, that lunch at Sammy’s Noodles and dinner at the Corner Bistro did help quite a bit. Nothin’ like a little grease to help a hangover. That, and a lot of Advil.

    I’m off skiing for the weekend, so no new posts for the next few days. I know — I can almost feel the disappointment oozing through the internet. I am slowly realizing, though, that my readership is steadily increasing. I think we may be up to about 10! It helps to have a big family. See you next week!